During my senior year in high school, I participated in the Instructional Practices in Education and Training course where I interned as a high school teacher aide. There were so many emotions events that occurred from October 2015 until my last day with them. Even though we had our last day at our field site, since we had to report to school even though they kicked us off, I would go over and say hello and wish them the best of luck. I even gave my last class some words of advice.
Because my high school works on block schedule, I had two different sets of classes, fall and spring. I lost contact with many of my fall students and I sincerely regret not taking more photos to cherish the moments. Along with there being two different classes, two new sets of students came in, each with new and different personalities. While some were similar, all were unique. I’m glad that a majority of my students were unique and brave and caring.
Being that my students were high school students like myself, it did make for tense situations and awkward encounters from time to time. But thankfully they all listened, to certain extents of course, and were willing to pay attention. They also put up with my humor so I have to thank them for that as well since it isn’t the funniest in the world.
They provided amazing opportunities, provided me with the chance to grow. Being there allowed for them to grow as well, and for the boys, learning how to tie a tie yet they never caught the hang of it. They had the chance to learn from someone different, a peer like them who knows what it is like to go through school and sitting in the desk.
Upon taking their photos, seeing their faces, and enjoying the moments with them, I felt so complete. My heart began to ache, knowing that I wouldn’t see many of them again. Every emotion that I had ever experienced throughout the entire experienced came crashing down. It fell onto my shoulders, mind and heart, bringing me to the point of tears. I made sure to compose myself for a few more moments for I did not want my students to see me cry. As soon as I left them, I walked to the restroom and washed my face so others wouldn’t have seen me crying.
But alone, I cried. Cried for a good period of time. More emotion and more pain in my heart than when I graduated, than when I had fractured my arm. More tears spilt than what I had spilt for several months. I hadn’t that much since the deaths of long-time family friends. It was all worth it though; being an intern was amazing. Getting to be a teacher, getting to make an impact, getting to grow so close to them is an experience I will never forget and I hope to become a teacher soon.